Magnificent

I'm a late bloomer, I've decided.  I didn't struggle with acne, body image issues, or peer pressure until mid-college.  SUPER DUPER.  Love it.

And, by the way, I'm still in the middle of all three of those issues, plus a few extra.  Anyone else out there?! Surely I'm not alone.

So, acne.  It sucks.  Let's move on.

Body image.  I know I'm made in God's image.  I know my body is a temple.  I know several things taste better than skinny feels.  I know discipline feels just about as good.  I'm actually in a pretty positive phase of this issue.  This category is okay for right now.

But peer pressure.  Or rather, the pressure to please the peers.  And superiors.  And underlings (that's what my students are getting called today.  It's a testing day.  I'm cranky.  :).  Sitting in my classroom today, in three or four hours of utter silence, watching my precious underlings test their little brains out, ol' Satan had a chance or two to tug on my ear and whisper stupid, horrid lies that seemed a lot like the truth.

You took 14 minutes on a 10 minute break.  They'll talk about you for that, for sure.  The principal will probably hear, and start to doubt your professionalism.

You should be a better teacher by now.  Why are you still making rookie mistakes?  Everyone else is near-perfect.  You should be even better than that.  You're an embarrassment. 

You should be able to control your student's behavior better than this.

Why haven't you gotten the house packed up yet?  You know you want to paint and everything.  You've had time.  Now it's never going to work.

You need to help your mom and dad more.  Their frustrations and scheduling issues could be fixed if you were more available.

You're the only one of your adult siblings who hasn't visited your grandparents since the accident.  Way to go, super girl.

Why don't you call your long-distance friends more often?  And siblings?  You're the weak link.

UGLY.  Disgusting.  That's how I felt.

And then, like a storm's first rushing wind, came the lyrics from the song a dear friend sang at our wedding:

Give me one pure and holy passion/
give me one magnificent obsession/
Lord, give me one glorious ambition for my life/
to know and follow hard after You.

And I remembered...I have responsibilities.  I have the ability to be successful.  I have a job to do and relationships to keep up and students to boss around teach.  But all those tasks and jobs and whathaveyou are merely elements of a greater journey, and in that one, there is only One to please.  If a coworker or friend or anyone else is displeased with me, I need to balance that against what, and who, my Lord has called me to be.  If those two opinions are in line, then I have some corrections to make.  But if they are different, I need to go with the Opinion that matters.

That's all I've got to say about that.  Thank you for tuning into my daily therapy.

xoxo Bec